Posted by: ImpendingDawn | March 8, 2011

Fear: You can GTFO.

Fear crushes so many opportunities. What would I do if I wasn’t scared?

I love swimming, but I don’t swim very often because I’m scared of people seeing my body. I love dancing, but I don’t dance very often because I’m afraid I’ll look like an idiot. I love worship, but I don’t worship very often because I’m terrified that I’ll start crying in front of others.

Horseback riding lessons are something I’ve wanted to try for years. Singing on the worship team is something I’ve been toying with for months. I want to learn guitar, I want to take crazy pictures with my friends, I want to let loose and have some fun!

I’ve become comfortable staying quiet and crushing desires that I’ve deemed silly or unreasonable. But something is wrong when I’m holding myself back from doing things that I love because I’m afraid. Something is wrong when I can’t even be myself around the people who love me.

So WABAM! PREPARE YOURSELVES FOR MY CRAZINESS! It may take a while, but I am going to learn how to be my weird self. If I feel like shaking my booty to some shitty pop music, I SHALL. If I feel like taking some retarded pictures with my friends, I SHALL. If I feel like jumping off a bridge into the freezing cold water, I – wait. Maybe that is one desire I should continue to deny… Heh.

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