Posted by: ImpendingDawn | September 13, 2011

School Tips From A Crazy Person

I am writing this from a desk in the Computer Commons at my [insert snobby voice here] “post-secondary institution.”

Things I have learned during the first week of school:

  • Plan to arrive at your bus stop AT LEAST five minutes early – preferably ten.
  • DO NOT sit next to an obese person on the bus. Not only will their fat squish your bum and hips, you will be crushed if they fall asleep.
  • Building on the last point, if you get sleepy on car/bus/hot air balloon rides, SIT NEXT TO THE WINDOW. Nobody wants a stranger sleeping on their shoulder, okay?
  • Keep a large sum of money in your bank account for books and other supplies. If there is no way you can buy everything for the first day of classes, MAKE SURE to buy the books; not only will you most likely need them immediately, they can take weeks to order if the book store runs out. And being without books for weeks is not only a pain in the ass, it’s kind of embarrassing.
  • If you are bringing a lunch from home, refrain from those delicious microwave meals for a while – at least until you figure out where the microwaves are.
  • *Attempt* to stay calm and confident. Start conversations with people – they’re in need of friends just as much as you are. Note the usage of the word confident. Did I say snobby, pompous, or arrogant? NO. Nobody wants to hear you bragging about your previous schooling, the fact that you have already worked in the industry, or the year that you spent raising a baby warthog. It might make you feel awesome, but it will alienate most potential friends.
  • Bring a maaaaaaaap! Maps are fun. Getting lost isn’t.

On a more personal level, I discovered that my school offers free personal counseling! Yays! You have to either call them and book an appointment, or go to the office in person and talk to a receptionist. However, I must admit that I am absolutely terrified to do so. I’ve never gotten counseling before! And even though I know I need some help, going to a counselor makes my problems so… official. I don’t know if I’m ready for that.

But! Happy personal discovery! I can make friends. I might actually be GOOD at making friends! Crazy, right? *glee*



  1. BUT I THOUGHT PEOPLE LIKED HEARING ABOUT MY BABY WARTHOG. Maybe that’s why I have no friends…


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